attention all “touchy” people

Now that it’s the weekend, I figured I’d share some thoughts re: going out, drinking, touching.

I’ve always been the kind of person who likes everyone to respect my “personal bubble”. That means, unless you’re my boyfriend, girl friend or family member (and even then there are limits), keep your hands to yourself and do not invade my personal space on a regular basis. I do not understand “touchy” people; I do not understand why they think it is appropriate to grope (sexually or not) anyone at their leisure. 

Touching can be a great way to flirt on a date, don’t get me wrong. But that is a very specific situation, and personally I feel it is pretty obvious if a girl (or boy) is flirting back with you enough on a date to initiate a touch on the arm, hand or back. Eye contact, smiling and laughing are all great indicators of a mutual connection. In this situation, respectfully touch away.

MOST other situations do not warrant touching. If you are out in a group of a few people, do not touch someone’s knee under the table unless you are TRYING to flirt with them. Moving through a crowded bar? There’s no need to guide the person in front of you with your hands, anywhere on their body. They’ve walked before, they know how it’s done. Every seen a line of girls walk through a bar? They all hold HANDS, not HIPS.

I’m surprised I have to call this one out – like really guys – are we still 7 year olds? – do not try and trickle someone unless you know them extremely well, and you are in private. That is not appropriate bar or restaurant behavior. 

And one final caveat, JUST BECAUSE YOU’RE DRUNK DOES NOT MEAN YOU CAN TOUCH WHOMEVER AND WHATEVER YOU WANT. No exceptions.

So, if you are in fact a “touchy” person, maybe re-evaluate your actions. Have you ever noticed that someone makes a face when you touch them in a certain way? Maybe you should stop doing it then. Ever noticed that no one ever touches you as much as you touch others? It’s for a reason. It makes many people (including myself) uncomfortable. 

Just say no, and keep your hands to yourself. In public anyway. 

diet essentials

It can be very hard to be healthy in this city; everywhere you look there are temptations. Even your go-to neighborhood deli can derail your diet with overstuffed sandwiches, big bags of chips and greasy french fries.

Luckily, if you look in the right places (and never walk by a Bravo’s Pizza), you can find many healthy options in New York — just don’t expect them to be cheaper than your usual groceries.

Here are my top 6 essentials for staying on track (as a dairy-free vegan/pescatarian).

Juice is one of my favorite ways to curb cravings and consume vegetables I don’t otherwise like. What is it about celery that I hate so much in solid form but don’t mind in juice?

No, I do not replace meals with juice, that is just silly. Everyone knows you should limit the amount of calories you drink since your body does not register them as efficiently as calories consumed in food. But next time you’re craving a bag of chips or want to eat lunch at 11am, chug a big glass of water or seltzer and then reach for a juice. Your gut and skin will thank you (green juice does wonders for troublesome skin).

You are all by now aware of my obsession with Gwyneth Paltrow and her cookbook and general superiority to most humans, even though that also makes me hate-her-love-her. Anyway, she has a kick-ass quinoa granola recipe that can be tailored to fit all your dietary preferences. There are only 4 (technically 3 but I substitute agave nectar for half of the maple syrup so it does not taste like the forest) mandatory ingredients (the rest are optional additions like fruits and nuts) and it takes 25 minutes (including prep time) to complete. I am only of the laziest chefs in the world, and I promise it is ridiculously easy to make. I can almost guarantee that it will make you excited to wake up and eat breakfast in the morning. Win-win.

You knew this was coming; you gotta hit the gym. Do whatever you can tolerate for an hour 2-3 times a week. If nothing else, there are usually very attractive people at New York City gyms. Let them motivate you to be your best self or to flirt a little when you’re stretching.

Seafood, seafood and more seafood. Sushi is one of my major food groups. I know Gwyneth doesn’t totally approve, but I can’t help myself. Especially when there’s a delivery place on my block that can arrive within 15 minutes of ordering. Unreal in NYC, right?

I try to only eat animal protein once a day (usually for dinner so I’m vegan 2/3 meals), and I almost always make it fish. There are plenty of great meats out there, and I know I’m probably deficient in iron and many other things that animal proteins supply, but when I take the time to work out and monitor my eating habits, I personally like to see results quickly, and seafood is a great way to keep fat and calorie intakes low. They say it takes your body 4 days to process steak. That means that you could still be digesting the steak you had at dinner on Friday the following Monday. Ew.

No one can be perfect all the time — give yourself one cheat day a week when you can indulge in your favorite foods that might not be “diet” appropriate. It’s not an excuse to stuff your face for hours on end, but let yourself eat what you want and don’t feel guilty. If you can’t handle a full day, give yourself one cheat meal. For me, it’s a bagel every Sunday. Does anything taste better when you’re hungover and hungry and all cuddled in bed? I think not.

Committing to a new way of eating can require a lot of hard work and effort, but ultimately, you want the changes you’ve made to become long-term lifestyle changes, not temporary cosmetic fixes (most likely). So it’s important to find alternative recipes for some more traditional “bad” foods so you don’t feel left out or unsatisfied. For me, vegan chocolate cookies are a great way to have something sweet that won’t leave my stomach feeling terrible or make me regret consuming them two hours later. There are so many gluten-free, dairy-free, soy-free, sugar-free etc cookbooks out there, try them all and enjoy the process of finding your favorites by cooking with friends, sharing advice and learning from each other’s mistakes — some chocolate alternatives are just nasty!

x S

shoe porn

I don’t know what the rest of you did on this beautiful New York City day, but I went shopping. My sister and I wandered around the West Village (for a little longer than we had planned… I may have gotten a little lost) and Meatpacking district enjoying the sunshine and sales. Luckily for our wallets, we both found incredible deals on two incredible items: an Herve Leroux for her, Maison Martin Margiela booties for me (my first pair!).

I don’t know about you, but when I find something I love, on sale, in my size, it feels like it was just waiting for me to find it, like it was destined to be mine. I know it’s silly and absolutely irrational, but there’s something so satisfying in finding something fabulous that’s been marked down three times. Can’t argue with that, right?

It isn’t just that they’re Maison Martin Margiela. It’s not just that they’re actually practical and comfortable. It’s not that they’re oxblood. It’s the fact that they’re basically a piece of art. The paint drips remind me of my favorite paintings where gesture and movement has been frozen in time.

One of my favorite aspects of fashion is how certain pieces really are works of art, made to be worn. Yes, clothes are utilitarian and can be transformative, but there is something about finding garments or accessories that speak to more creative intentions. There is something to walking around in a piece of art.

If you have no idea what I’m talking about, go to a modern art museum and then a Maison Martin Margiela store, because this feeling is not to be missed.

Arctic Monkey’s AM

Only album I need this week

i shop therefore i am

It’s been a long week. And it’s only Tuesday.

Personally, I am so physically and emotionally exhausted that I can’t even be bothered to communicate with anyone or pay attention to anything going on around me. On days like this, when I feel so drained that it is difficult to function, there’s really only two or three things I want to do: a) get in bed and watch Netflix until I’m cross-eyed or b) get in bed and indulge in some retail therapy.

Everyone who knows me (well or not) is most likely aware of my shopping habit. It’s kind of my thing, my charm; my relentless desire to search, find and acquire. I know it’s slightly immature and selfish, but hey, there are a lot of worse habits out there.

On days like today, I really don’t have the patience to peruse my usual sites (Shopbop, Net-a-Porter, The Outnet, Gilt Groupe, you know the drill) for the “great finds” my closet is lacking. On days like today, I rely on my Pinterest board inspired by Barbara Kruger’s “I Shop Therefore I Am” 1987 screen print. Regardless of Barbara’s intentions, I feel this slogan does in fact apply to my life; shopping brings me satisfaction and joy that many akin to other things, but I don’t care. It makes me happy and feel empowered, and that’s what matters.

On this board, I keep track of all the items I see online that I cannot bring myself to purchase. That way, when I am ready to spend my hard-earned money, I only have to look in one place for my favorite new shoes, bags, jewels, and clothes. Makes sense, right? It’s a good thing to have to show potential employers, styling and personal shopping clients too because it is a pretty great representation of my style and aesthetics.

So, for those of you who feel my pain and cannot believe this week isn’t even halfway over, take my advice and indulge in some retail therapy.

samba time

Being a pescatarian in New York City really isn’t that difficult. My seamless delivery zone alone is filled with at least a dozen different cuisines. The real key of being a picky eater is never letting yourself get bored.

As someone who consumes more sushi than anyone would ever recommend, I keep my boredom at bay by finding restaurants that use simple and fresh ingredients in unexpected ways to compliment my go-to places.

A great place to start? Sushi Samba.

Sushi Samba was the place to wine & dine a few years ago but has fallen off the map a little recently. Take advantage of your ability to get a reservation at pretty much whatever time you want (even a few days before) and see for yourself. Not only do they have an extensive cocktail and sake list, but the menu itself is diverse and easy to navigate for even the pickiest eaters. My recommendations are as follows:

Shishito peppers with sea salt and lemon

Tuna Tataki with white asparagus, fresh heart of palm, avocado and citrus soy

Crispy Maine Lobster Taquitos with lemongrass, frisée and hearts of palm

Kanpachi Tiradito with yuzu, sea salt and black truffle oil

Sao Haku roll (yellowtail, tuna, salmon tartare, crispy sweet potato, shibazuke, wasabi soy)

If you’re not salivating, we probably wouldn’t get along very well.

If you are, make a reservation now. 

need it now

what i want right now

earring perfection.

how i feel

How I feel about Valentine’s Day courtesy of #whatshouldwecallme

 

listen up

Listen up ladies. This has really gone on too long.

Why is it that when a woman starts seeing someone (“officially dating” or not) who she knows isn’t the best person (because he’s rude, lazy, self-centered, you name it), she is then surprised when he starts acting like an asshole in the relationship?

It’s not rocket science, and this really has to stop. It’s making us look bad.

Most people have to be in a very serious, committed relationship to actually want to even try to change, and even then, the margins are thin. We all have instincts, and those do not change overnight. Ultimately, even the best intentions do not create results.

In the case of the woman versus the (young) asshole, you’re not winning that one. Years of positive reinforcement have taught him it’s okay, and if we’re all honest with ourselves, it probably is. Everyone is the “asshole” at some point.

So moving forward, just be honest with yourself about what you want and what your expectations are before you get lost in some one-word texting-version of hell. It’ll be a win-win for all of us.

And who knows, you might actually meet someone who enjoys giving a shit.

x S

it’s all good

 

I had no idea when I received Gwyneth Paltrow’s latest cookbook “It’s All Good” as a birthday present that it would have such an awesome, revelatory effect on my health. I’ve done the vegan thing (it was rather difficult to maintain all day every day), the “Skinny Bitch” thing (I was practically terrified to even look at meat), the low-carb thing (that lasted about two days), but this has been the first time where I can actually imagine keeping these practices up. It’s not a diet; it’s a lifestyle, and it’s genius.

Not only are the recipes simple (I have NO patience in life and especially none for cooking), but you can make easy substitutions based on allergies, dietary restrictions or even taste preferences. The quinoa granola and green juice recipes literally make me excited to wake up in the morning. Yeah, I’m serious.

And the best part is, you can be as extreme and Gwyneth-like as you want. Don’t want to be gluten free? No problem, just use normal flour. Don’t want to use almond milk because you don’t like the taste? No problem, use coconut. Because the recipes are simple and made from only a handful of ingredients, you really can cater each one to work for you.

Now don’t get me wrong – you really have to commit to this to make it work – taste preferences do not change overnight, and if you are constantly eating out or with people who are not on this regimen, your willpower will be tested. But my experience has been, if it works for you, it really works for you.

So do yourself a favor, get your butt back in the gym (as frequently as you can stand it), buy this book and watch your body transform into a lean, healthy powerhouse. Good luck…