A ROMANTIC RANT

You’ve Got Mail came out in 1998. I was 8 the first time I saw it and instantly fell in love with the complicated love story that played out in my favorite city in the world – New York. I used to watch it every Saturday and Sunday morning, fantasizing about the day I would move there myself and find my own twisted romance.

It really is the ultimate romantic comedy, wherein two enemies fall in love without knowing who the other one truly is, thanks to technology (Tom Hanks finds out about halfway through, but Meg Ryan does not know until the end). Even though the movie came out a few decades ago, the element of technology was responsible for connecting Meg Ryan’s and Tom Hanks’ characters – two people who probably would have never been able to reconcile their differences otherwise. Ironically, not much has changed. The way we communicate greatly effects our platonic and romantic relationships, and in the case of Kathleen Kelly and Joe Fox, it changed everything.

Every time I watch it, I fall deeper and deeper in love with New York and the possibilities it contains. Take a break from being cynical and watch it with me.

(A silly scene from the movie, as seen from my bed)

 

the great gatsby

“So we beat on,

boats against the current,

            borne back ceaselessly

into the past.”

 

I’ve loved F. Scott Fitzgerald’s The Great Gatsby ever since I was told to read it back in middle school (or was it high school? I can’t remember). I’d like to think that as far as required reading goes, The Great Gatsby is the most enjoyable, powerful and heartbreaking story of love, nostalgia, hope, fantasy and greed. I’d like to think that Gatsby is a book that many adults re-read by choice for its ability to inspire and provoke even the least romantic souls.

The modern movie, directed by Baz Luhrmann, received many harsh critiques for its incorporation of Jay Z and Lana del Ray (her “Young and Beautiful” seemingly on repeat) and a missed-interpretation of the characters. I personally never think movies are better than their written counterparts — they’re just a different way to enjoy the same message. Obviously it was not as good; the original was meant to be enjoyed on a page and in your mind, not on a screen. 

Leonardo DiCaprio’s Gatsby therefore did not disappoint me; I thought the movie was poetic and raw and a great way to spend a few hours on a gray, gloomy Sunday. I knew inevitably Gatsby would have to die; once Daisy witnesses him lose his temper, you can practically see her love for him draining out of her. That’s when you see Gatsby fall into a deep state of denial, unable to leave her side, because he knows it will never again be like it was. Their love had spun out of control, and the accidental death of Tom’s mistress (by Daisy’s hand) only drove them further apart. 

The glimmer of hope in Gatsby’s eye as he waited for Daisy’s call after the accident was almost painful to watch. As he stands alone near his glistening turquoise pool, the audience knows he will never hear her voice again, and she will never truly understand his devoted and obsessive love for her.

His death was the most romantic and poetic end for a passionate and extravagant man: dying for the only thing he ever really cared about; dying for the only thing he’d give everything up for. Gatsby died protecting the woman that he loved; regrettably and unfortunately, Daisy never had that kind of courage. She was a coward, and while Gatsby was not without faults, he never lost hope — hope of the future finally being as good as his idealized version of the past; hope that his love for Daisy would finally be fulfilled, so he could stop dreaming of something better because he would finally have everything he wanted: her. 

an instant

that first kiss

I know this video is getting a lot of hate, but I love it; it captures the wonderful awkwardness of a first kiss with someone new.

itchin’ on a photograph

some people

It amazes me the lengths some people go to put others down. I cannot imagine how they even have the time or the energy to devote to go so far out of their way just to make a point.

The internet can provide its users with anonymity: some chose to let this give them the freedom or fearless they lack to share their thoughts or ideas; others chose to take advantage of the not knowing to bully or inflict pain, doing things they would never in public or “real life”.

I started this blog for myself, for my thoughts, my inspiration, my friends, my lifestyle. The reality is, if you don’t like me, you probably shouldn’t waste your time reading it.

I received a very malicious, aggressive comment after my last post, by someone who seems to think they know me pretty well but clearly doesn’t. To whoever you are, I hope you think twice next time and mind your own business. If you want to put your thoughts out into the world, start your own damn blog. Or have the balls to say it to my face. I don’t appreciate that kind of behavior and frankly don’t think I should have to deal with it, when you are clearly choosing to read my posts.

To those reading who actually respect others and would never think to do such a thing, I apologize. The world needs more people like you.

Lesson to be learned? Never let anyone put you down and always speak up for yourself and what you think is right. Cliched or not, you know it’s important. Let’s keep it that way.

tgif

kate moss and some skeletons courtesy of terry richardson

attention all “touchy” people

Now that it’s the weekend, I figured I’d share some thoughts re: going out, drinking, touching.

I’ve always been the kind of person who likes everyone to respect my “personal bubble”. That means, unless you’re my boyfriend, girl friend or family member (and even then there are limits), keep your hands to yourself and do not invade my personal space on a regular basis. I do not understand “touchy” people; I do not understand why they think it is appropriate to grope (sexually or not) anyone at their leisure. 

Touching can be a great way to flirt on a date, don’t get me wrong. But that is a very specific situation, and personally I feel it is pretty obvious if a girl (or boy) is flirting back with you enough on a date to initiate a touch on the arm, hand or back. Eye contact, smiling and laughing are all great indicators of a mutual connection. In this situation, respectfully touch away.

MOST other situations do not warrant touching. If you are out in a group of a few people, do not touch someone’s knee under the table unless you are TRYING to flirt with them. Moving through a crowded bar? There’s no need to guide the person in front of you with your hands, anywhere on their body. They’ve walked before, they know how it’s done. Every seen a line of girls walk through a bar? They all hold HANDS, not HIPS.

I’m surprised I have to call this one out – like really guys – are we still 7 year olds? – do not try and trickle someone unless you know them extremely well, and you are in private. That is not appropriate bar or restaurant behavior. 

And one final caveat, JUST BECAUSE YOU’RE DRUNK DOES NOT MEAN YOU CAN TOUCH WHOMEVER AND WHATEVER YOU WANT. No exceptions.

So, if you are in fact a “touchy” person, maybe re-evaluate your actions. Have you ever noticed that someone makes a face when you touch them in a certain way? Maybe you should stop doing it then. Ever noticed that no one ever touches you as much as you touch others? It’s for a reason. It makes many people (including myself) uncomfortable. 

Just say no, and keep your hands to yourself. In public anyway. 

diet essentials

It can be very hard to be healthy in this city; everywhere you look there are temptations. Even your go-to neighborhood deli can derail your diet with overstuffed sandwiches, big bags of chips and greasy french fries.

Luckily, if you look in the right places (and never walk by a Bravo’s Pizza), you can find many healthy options in New York — just don’t expect them to be cheaper than your usual groceries.

Here are my top 6 essentials for staying on track (as a dairy-free vegan/pescatarian).

Juice is one of my favorite ways to curb cravings and consume vegetables I don’t otherwise like. What is it about celery that I hate so much in solid form but don’t mind in juice?

No, I do not replace meals with juice, that is just silly. Everyone knows you should limit the amount of calories you drink since your body does not register them as efficiently as calories consumed in food. But next time you’re craving a bag of chips or want to eat lunch at 11am, chug a big glass of water or seltzer and then reach for a juice. Your gut and skin will thank you (green juice does wonders for troublesome skin).

You are all by now aware of my obsession with Gwyneth Paltrow and her cookbook and general superiority to most humans, even though that also makes me hate-her-love-her. Anyway, she has a kick-ass quinoa granola recipe that can be tailored to fit all your dietary preferences. There are only 4 (technically 3 but I substitute agave nectar for half of the maple syrup so it does not taste like the forest) mandatory ingredients (the rest are optional additions like fruits and nuts) and it takes 25 minutes (including prep time) to complete. I am only of the laziest chefs in the world, and I promise it is ridiculously easy to make. I can almost guarantee that it will make you excited to wake up and eat breakfast in the morning. Win-win.

You knew this was coming; you gotta hit the gym. Do whatever you can tolerate for an hour 2-3 times a week. If nothing else, there are usually very attractive people at New York City gyms. Let them motivate you to be your best self or to flirt a little when you’re stretching.

Seafood, seafood and more seafood. Sushi is one of my major food groups. I know Gwyneth doesn’t totally approve, but I can’t help myself. Especially when there’s a delivery place on my block that can arrive within 15 minutes of ordering. Unreal in NYC, right?

I try to only eat animal protein once a day (usually for dinner so I’m vegan 2/3 meals), and I almost always make it fish. There are plenty of great meats out there, and I know I’m probably deficient in iron and many other things that animal proteins supply, but when I take the time to work out and monitor my eating habits, I personally like to see results quickly, and seafood is a great way to keep fat and calorie intakes low. They say it takes your body 4 days to process steak. That means that you could still be digesting the steak you had at dinner on Friday the following Monday. Ew.

No one can be perfect all the time — give yourself one cheat day a week when you can indulge in your favorite foods that might not be “diet” appropriate. It’s not an excuse to stuff your face for hours on end, but let yourself eat what you want and don’t feel guilty. If you can’t handle a full day, give yourself one cheat meal. For me, it’s a bagel every Sunday. Does anything taste better when you’re hungover and hungry and all cuddled in bed? I think not.

Committing to a new way of eating can require a lot of hard work and effort, but ultimately, you want the changes you’ve made to become long-term lifestyle changes, not temporary cosmetic fixes (most likely). So it’s important to find alternative recipes for some more traditional “bad” foods so you don’t feel left out or unsatisfied. For me, vegan chocolate cookies are a great way to have something sweet that won’t leave my stomach feeling terrible or make me regret consuming them two hours later. There are so many gluten-free, dairy-free, soy-free, sugar-free etc cookbooks out there, try them all and enjoy the process of finding your favorites by cooking with friends, sharing advice and learning from each other’s mistakes — some chocolate alternatives are just nasty!

x S

shoe porn

I don’t know what the rest of you did on this beautiful New York City day, but I went shopping. My sister and I wandered around the West Village (for a little longer than we had planned… I may have gotten a little lost) and Meatpacking district enjoying the sunshine and sales. Luckily for our wallets, we both found incredible deals on two incredible items: an Herve Leroux for her, Maison Martin Margiela booties for me (my first pair!).

I don’t know about you, but when I find something I love, on sale, in my size, it feels like it was just waiting for me to find it, like it was destined to be mine. I know it’s silly and absolutely irrational, but there’s something so satisfying in finding something fabulous that’s been marked down three times. Can’t argue with that, right?

It isn’t just that they’re Maison Martin Margiela. It’s not just that they’re actually practical and comfortable. It’s not that they’re oxblood. It’s the fact that they’re basically a piece of art. The paint drips remind me of my favorite paintings where gesture and movement has been frozen in time.

One of my favorite aspects of fashion is how certain pieces really are works of art, made to be worn. Yes, clothes are utilitarian and can be transformative, but there is something about finding garments or accessories that speak to more creative intentions. There is something to walking around in a piece of art.

If you have no idea what I’m talking about, go to a modern art museum and then a Maison Martin Margiela store, because this feeling is not to be missed.